An opinion based off experience
*This post contains graphic descriptions of sexual activities. If you think that this may bother you I suggest that you skip this post.
Prior to my current relationship I was in one that was as simple as it was complex. My then partner and I had a mutual understanding that we both not only loved to fuck but that we were also of a mindset that allowed us to explore this love of sexual play not only with each other but outside of our relationship. Neither of us were prone to jealousy and with a helping hand from a few shared kinks were thus easily able to take that leap and declared that an open relationship should be something that we should explore.
During the three years that he and I were together we often times had lovers on the side, and our flexible sexualities even allowed us on occasion to share these lovers with each other. While others we knew wished for the same freedom to step out on their partner without repercussion and multiple three ways that we would find ourselves enjoying it was pretty much common sense that what we had was not for every one.
First off jealousy is a fickle monster, sometimes lurking just beneath the surface undetected until it explodes forth with all its ugly fury. Secondly not every open relationship is conducted in such an open manner as we had. Either due to a fear of judgmental opinions of others or because partners while consenting on the fact that their partner may sleep around may not wish or be able to stomach every detail or even be able to watch as they engage in sexual relations with others.
Our personalities make it difficult to be swayed by others opinions, and how others view us is not something that we take into consideration so we had little to fear about being in the open. Another thing is the both of us possessed voyeurism kinks and an openness of mind that also allowed us to not only share details but also allowed us to engage in sexual activities right under the watchful eyes of the other.
Our combined open mindedness giving us courage to experience the “taboo”. Both of were already well versed in BDSM but now we found in the other a partner with which to share some of our more outlandish kinks and fetishes. Erotic Asphyxiation, CBT, humiliation, power struggle play, rape fantasies and multiple partners
There was no jealousy, no hurtful feelings of betrayal as we watched the other find carnal pleasure with a third party. He would look on as I fucked both males and females, and I the same when it was him doing the fucking. He would hold my hair from my face while I took another mans dick in my throat, and I would trail my fingers along his lower back while he was between the thighs of another girl. And if the person consented we would even join in. Three ways were experienced that were both of the m/f/m flavor as well as f/m/f. A few times these third participants were from our close circle of friends but more often than not they were the person that we were seeing.
We were as safe as possible during sexual encounters, with condoms being used every single time even when it was just he and I. We would even make sure that new condoms were used as either he or I switched between partners. Our partners were an equal mixture of male and females which allowed us to enjoy both sexes at once.
The both of us fully dominating another , giving them the best of both genders. I indulged his fantasy of being pleasured by two females at once , myself equally aroused as he fucked her while she went down on me. In return he allowed me the chance to make real my own fantasy of double penetration, as he took me anally while a male lover buried himself in my wet pussy. We also got live out fantasies of receiving and/or giving oral while also engaged in sexual intercourse; three way oral sessions, or me being fucked on all fours while a hard dick muffled my moans or our favorite, reverse cow girl while the other person was busy between my legs, their tongue pleasuring the both of us as I rode him.
Besides sharing details and fantasies we would also discuss limits. What was and wasn't allowed, what may make us uncomfortable or may present an issue for us and our relationship. Our friends would discuss our exploits with equal mixture of envy and curiosity. A few even openly talked of desires to be in similar situations, to which we would point out that full openness takes a special kind of personality. We would always stress that while what we had seemed like a dream, for others it would be a nightmare.
Resentment, jealousy, feelings of inadequacy are all a possibility. We were lucky, our love of casual sex and the way it heightened our arousal and pleasure made all that a non issue. So while open relationships might sound like a good thing there is a lot to take into consideration before making that jump. I will explore some these is upcoming posts.