Slut. Whore. I have been called that
and much more to my face. Almost always the words were uttered by
females. The only time those words were ever uttered by males were
during bedroom encounters and only after my own urging. Is this a
phenomena that I have managed to escape: men using sexually
derogatory terms...men not taking no for an answer...men coming on to
me in overtly sexual manners that crosses the line...
Or perhaps it is the fact that I make
my intentions clear from the start. If I am not interested I let the
other person know it. I am not coy, I do not beat around the bush.
I just state “I am flattered, but I am not interested/attracted to
you.” I leave it at that and walk away (if they haven't already).
No need to elaborate and perhaps confuse the poor person. In my
experience those who identify as male have always taken the rejection
well, it was women who continued to flirt even after I made my
position clear. It was with them that I was forced to elaborate and
felt the need to explain myself.
I am a very aggressive person by
nature. I am also self confident. Two things that I not afraid to
show, damned being a lady. I have had sexual relations with well over a
hundred people, yet like I said it has been only females who have
openly judged me for that. As a teen in high school it was the girls
who spread the rumors that I took on a group of boys over the
weekend. It was the girls who physically accosted me for being in
touch with my sexuality and not ashamed to explore it. The boys?
They largely ignored it, or were curious as to techniques that girls
might enjoy.
Females are far more vindictive. How
often has one witnessed a the male counterpart of a broken
relationship go out and do something to get his ex back...Or engaging the new partner of the ex to fight. Now compare
that to females engaging in such acts. The scale does tip more
towards the females on this one.
As an adult I have encountered far more
females who think me abnormal for owning and using sex toys. I have
heard everything from obviously my partner doesn't satisfy me...that
I must be some type of cock slut to masturbate...to I am plain weird
because “normal” females don't do such “disgusting” things.
My male friends on the other hand are intrigued. They will ask
questions pertaining to ideas of bringing their female partners as
much pleasure as possible. They have even remarked that it is refreshing to know a female that not only isn't afraid of her sexuality but explores it freely.
I have watched some of them be called
assholes because of one night stands. The girl they fucked now feeling
hurt and betrayed when the sun came up and realization sunk in that
yes they were indeed nothing more that a single night of fun. This
would piss me off as I had seen my male friends always be up front
and honest about their intentions with these girls, clearly stating from the get go that they were merely looking for a little fun. It was the girls who pressed and
then went psycho when things didn't go their way and the harsh
reality that he had spoken the truth before the hook-up took hold. I
even had the same shit happen, girls taking one night stands to mean
I wanted more...even when I told them from the start (at the
bar/club) that I was only looking for a quick fuck. I can't count how
many times I heard “I thought you might change your mind. ”More
often than not I was called a bitch or a whore because I didn't want
a relationship. Never once were those words uttered by males. The
men took it for what it was, a no strings attached wild night of sex.
So as we bash the opposite gender we
should also look at ours. Females are far more vicious than males
when it comes to persecuting females. And if men are said to encourage this type
of behavior why then do the vast majority of them get disgusted when they see
this or stare in disbelief as their girlfriend rips down another of
her own gender?
Kudos! Male in NYC.
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