Part Two
Three is Not Always a
Crowd
In Part
one of this series I briefly brought up threesomes while discussing
the terms of my prior open relationship. Threesomes have been
something that I am quite often asked about. Usually the person
asking about it will offer up the information that they and their
partner have been discussing participating in one to perhaps spice up
their bedroom activities or to bring to reality a fantasy that one or
both has. While I am firm believer of to each their own, I always
have to caution others in relation to this topic.
Three-ways
are often times a male fantasy, perhaps even it is something that
they jerk off to. Two girls not only pleasing him but each other. I
have yet to encounter a single male that was attracted to females who
hasn't thought about it at least once. More often not they picture a
very specific scenario in their mind, and feel confident enough that
they would be able to allow their girlfriend the chance to be with
another female just to make that scenario a reality.
We have
all heard the cautionary tales of three-ways gone wrong. Perhaps
you, dear reader, even have a friend who has one to relate. They warn
that the reality is far from the fantasy. That jealousy can easily
result even if all involved thought it wouldn't. While there is never
a guarantee that things won't go horribly wrong there are a few
things that can help the parties involved better prepare themselves.
The
first rule of any threesome is communication. Not only between the
actual couple, but also the “third”. It is a good idea for all
parties involved to have a chance to voice not only their
expectations but also any concerns and limits that they may have.
Except in the cases of a spontaneous threesome that I found myself in
a handful of times, things were always discussed before hand in great
detail.
The
second rule is the placement of rules and boundaries. Some rules may
be as simple as the male participant can only engage oral sexual acts
but that actual vaginal and/or anal penetration of either one or both
females is not allowed. The possibilities of rules are actually
endless. I was once involved in one where the other girl allowed the
use of toys on her, but she was not comfortable enough to engage in
all out girl/girl action.
The
third golden rule is respect. Respect not only of yourself but each
other. In the above situation I respected the girl enough to not only
not push the subject but that during the heat of the moment when she
suggested that we 69 that I pulled back and asked her to really think
it through. That it was better to not engage in it during this time
around, but that it as something that we should discuss out of the
moment and not when sexual activities and lust might cloud our
judgment.
The
fourth rule goes along with number three. If any single person is
not comfortable with something, it should be common sense that said
activity should not be engaged in. Respect of boundaries is very
important. If there is a breach of trust there is also a good
possibility that it is going to end bad. This is one of the factors
for many post three-way break ups.
The
fifth rule is understand that there is a possibility for jealousy to
come about. Sure the male may be happy with seeing his girlfriend in
throes of carnal passion with another girl in his fantasies. He may
even claim to be of the mindset that girl/girl action is in fact not
a form of cheating. The male should thoroughly examine his position
on this. Again the reality is far different than the fantasy and
there is a possibility that either during or after he may come to
view it as cheating.
Friendships
have been destroyed and couples have broken up over three-ways, but
that shouldn't keep you from unless considering the possibility. If
conducted properly, and mutual respect is held to high degree before,
during and after they can be quite fun.
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